CarolinaDivina

any dreams lately???

Thursday, September 17, 2009

i've got a spider sticker

can't believe the summer is over - i wish i could type while i drive - i swear the only time i think of things to write and do is when i should be focusing on that 15 minutes of travel between work and Paola's school.
i can do this and i will do that and this is ready and that needs just one more this...
i get home and the day is gone
aaaaaah
but se la vi
and i have la vi
and it makes me happy most of the time

the other day i was pondering....
maybe i am the one who graced my son, and now by the looks of it, my daughter, their unfathomable amount of energy and ADHDness
maybe i have lived with ADD so thoroughly that i wasn't even aware of it
i was talking to a very wonderful person whom i admire greatly - about how easy it was for me to move past things that to others have historically been trying and emotionally draining
this statement was not born from any sort of pomposity, but more appropriately out of a sincere curiosity as i had recently played the role of the comforting shoulder (something i hadn't done in a long time)
this occasion made me wonder where my words came from and how i managed to have the perspective i did
in retrospect, i could not remember ever being as distraught over such an occurrence, although without a doubt, there had been such occurrences in my life
the question that came about was this
was i able to move forward and past it because my ADD prevented me from becoming consumed by the horror of it
OR
did i suffer just as much as i've observed others to do so but merely forgot by virtue of the nature of ADD
OR
am i really that cool

i concluded this ponderance by adopting the lesser of all evils
i really AM that cool