you took me to the emergency room
you wanted to see what it was like
i was stressed out and you didn't like it
so you radiated your displeasure in my womb
making it tighten and relax
tighten and relax again
until my lower back hurt
i thought it was your foot
kicking me in a strange way
dr. karmel said that we must check in

i called home and got the voicemail
i thought your father was on the computer
reading the news or something
so i left a message hoping it would kick him off the computer
and he got the message right away and called us

your father was scared

i tried to be calm
i really didn't think it was anything too bad
i honestly thought that maybe i was just really tired and stressed
and that your foot was in a strange position

so your father drove us to the hospital
i have to say he was driving very calmly
i was surprised that he didn't lose control

when we got there
your father had to go sign us in
so now we are pre-registered
it was july eighteenth

they took us to a beautiful room
with a tv and dark furniture
it was really pretty i thought
your father hated it
he was pacing and nervous

but after the nurses came in
he calmed down a little bit
the nurses put all sorts of wires and plastic disks on my belly
your home
and we listened to your heartbeat
and the machine drew zig zag lines that meant you were happy
and we watched you swimming around all over the place
the nurses laughed at how much you were moving
they had to keep changing the positions of the disks that heard your heart

we stayed there for 5 or 6 hours
and you were hungry
so the nurse gave us graham crackers
which made you move even more

at least we know now
that we need to be ready for the day
it could happen any day now
and i can't wait to meet you
i can't wait to hear you
and play with you
and give you good food for breakfast
and watch you play with your daddy

killy was a big green snake
a beautiful emerald green snake
and he was really long
and i wanted to kill him

i started to choke him with both hands
and maru was in the same room with me
she was shocked and told me to stop
that this snake wasn't poisonous or dangerous

and i looked at the snake and it was mocking me
i couldn't squeeze the throat hard enough to harm it
and the snake was just tossing his head to and fro
as if struggling
but not really
he was making fun of my lack of strength

so i gave up
and then the snake wooed me with words
and languid looks
and eventually convinced me
somehow
to let it rest in my folded arms

the snake wrapped itself up like a bright green pretzel
and rested in my folded arms as if in a basket
as if it were a baby